I hold them between my fingers
With a stare meant only for the pitiful and disgusting
Making a gymnast of my stomach.
Sometimes, I eat it.
Sometimes, I don’t.
I regret either choice.

I have heard people say
That cupcakes are better than sex.

From what I know about cupcakes and sex;
I have never eaten
Five cupcakes and said,
“Ohmygod. I think I’m floating.”

But, last week I ate a half a cupcake with
Five tiny dicks on it.
I told the bachelorette “Congratulations!
You just got a dyke to put five dicks in her mouth.”

I will never enjoy a cupcake again,
Because I know
That the sugar in cupcakes can lead to
And heart disease.
It’s the silent killer
Feeding cancer cells
And starving the mind.

But, the sweetness of sex increases
Oxytocin and
Reducing the risk of heart disease.
the truest clean eating diet you’ll find.

But, maybe you’re going to fuck your Cupcake.

First, you’ll scrape off the pink frosting
Before it stains your sheets.
Pull off her paper dress
And lament what is left underneath

An unadorned muffin,
Grabbed in a hurry when the lights were off.
It was too early for breakfast. It definitely
Will not hold
Your appetite. Immediately after,
You’re already thinking of your next opportunity to eat alone.

Some things just stick with us longer.
Like the sweet sugar she left on my lips last night
And the sweet cream I can still taste on the tips
Of my fingers. The glaze over my body from
The heat we were cooking with.


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