I just want you to know
That I got your apology
I sent out my own,
But it wasn’t for you. 
You did not hold the other end of my loyalty. But when she laid her pain at my feet, we wept for my indiscretion. 
never sorry for 
The friendship, attempted and failed
sorry for the secret it became. 
Perspective, dear. 
Experience, darling. 
Mine. 
Yours. 
Hers. 
All separate vibrations. 
All resonating through me. 
Conflict. 
Resolution. 
letting go
Because my loyalty required both of my hands. The strength of all ten fingers and palms raised up. 
Holding onto faith alone. 
The palpable manifestation
Of evil your ghost became
Threatened to burn 
down my home. 
Out was my only way in. 

Rooms

Opening doors
Then closing 
When the moon chants
 “the truth
Will set you free”

Walking through doors
Crossing the threshold
Of trauma’s recent history

Just because we are in different rooms
Does not mean I have forgotten
I simply pushed through. I asked you to come, too.

I walk with such small
Grace, but I know that this
Is not a race. If I stumble
I always take time to fall. 

Maybe you’re in the room on the other side of the wall. 

Loyalty

There is loyalty in leaving.
Miscommunication can lead
To frustration. Loyalty is not you. 
Loyalty is me. 

Following my heart is not a punishable crime,
You said

Yet when my heart lead me
Away from you, you pointed your crooked finger in sly accusations
Of misplaced judgments 

Loyalty is me holding her
And saying I’m sorry

It’s understanding that
Humans are not perfect

Loyalty is understanding you, too. 
Not that it matters, because we all write our own stories. 

Warning

Do not fall
In love with me
You do not know
Where these alleys lead
You can read my words, 
You may think
You know something
You cannot fall in love with me. 
My heart is freedom reigned
My life is liberation
My soul flies freely
My mind is my safest place
Do not fall
In love with me
You do not know
Who I can be. 
I am all things
Beautiful 
Paper makes me real
But the truth
Is something to
Be revealed. 
Do not fall in love with me
You are wasting your time
My heart is unavailable
You saw the no vacancy sign
There is no waiting list
No reservations required
Simply this, my heart,
It belongs here, and not there. 
Love is irrational
At times it beats us
To our own punch
But my love has been
Punched enough
Do not fall in love with me
Because I cannot
Return your favors
You cannot fall in love with me
Because you do not know
What love really does. 

Phenomena

Your truth is
Different than
My truth and
Nothing but the truth
So help me God
Is what I speak. 

Just because
Your truth is 
A false sense
Of my truth
Does not give
You the right
To hold up your
Fingers and count
The slow steps I took forward

Time and space have a different motion from different phases and different places. 

Like what we call retrograde is not
One body moving backwards, but an illusion supplied by one body moving forward faster. 

What we used to know, 
We have learned is not true 
Because truth changes 
as facts change

But those who refuse to
Change their minds will always be
Too far ahead of themselves
To understand the problems 
Of space and time. 

So stop. Be still. And realize
That your truth is yours alone
And mine is meant only for me
we are all in a different space at a different time

No matter the illusion of a common experience. Our bodies are not time zones. 

Each perception remains
Aligned with our movement
 between fact and truth. 


Ecriture Feminine

Gently flowing conversations
Convert the open space 
To air blowing kisses
Words move through my
Body. my soft hands and
Softer lips come
Together explicating 
my Love for you. 
In this home we
Are two makers. 
Hell bent on
Creating Life for
Our own human 
Existence. 
Right now, all we have 
Is each other. Two young
Lovers sharing space
And time constructed by
Our own two Manicured
Hands.